My new favourite word

My new favourite word and/or insult is "cementitious"....

"Why, you cementitious lunk head!"

Seriously. Is that not awesome?

So the Captain began the installation of the cementitious backer units (CBU) - a.k.a concrete board - in the shower stall. Why did the captain do it without my help? Because they're frickin' heavy, that's why! Each board weighs a millionbazillion pounds. (Yes, I mirthfully engage in hyberbole, why do you ask?) In truth, each board weighs 33 lbs. I know this because the Despot's website told me so. What's unnerving is that each board is chockablock full of polystyrene beads (known to the world as styrofoam). Without those, the boards would easily weigh a millionbazillion pounds. Easily.

The big challenge with CBU is, in addition to its weight, that's it's cement! It's really hard to cut. We went through probably 10 utility knife blades scoring and snapping each board. Each one has a fibre mesh outer layer that reinforces the panel. You have to cut through this mesh before you can break the boards.

You can buy a carbide scoring tool,  for this but, well, we didn't.

Here, the captain measures and marks his cut line. I am so grateful for that pounded old level that Handy Dad donated to the lodge. Two out of three level bubbles are busted, but it makes a fantastic straight edge!

Score with the knife....
The captain gave up trying to score a straight line and just "winged" it. Wung it? Cut free-hand.

Then, pull the board up towards you and SNAP! It's worth mentioning that this stuff makes an awful mess. We had grit and styrofoam everywhere before we were through.

Measuring your cuts is very important; it's almost better to cut the board a little short than it is to cut it too long because it's near impossible to trim it down by a quarter of an inch once you've snapped it. The captain chewed away at one board with our tile nippers trying to shave it down to size. Lesson learned.

Once cut to the right size, it's time to hang it.

We picked up a kit at the Despot that included the fat-headed CBU screws and fibre-glass mesh tape that's meant for CBU (normal mesh tape won't cut it). What a good idea that was!

Don't these panels look heavy!?

Fast forward a couple of hours and the shower panels are installed! The hardest part of the install was measuring/marking/cutting the 4 holes for the shower head, faucet and controls. They recommend putting lipstick on these items and pressing the board into them to leave a mark. We didn't have any with us (lipstick? Cottage? Puhleez!) so I wedged my arm in behind the panels as the captain held them in place and marked the spots as best I could with a pencil.  He then drilled a series of holes with a masonry bit (don't use your normal drill bits for  this!) and then tapped out the centres with a hammer. The holes are a little jaggedy, but they do the trick.

If it looks like the floor is uneven in this photo, that's because it is: the shower floor is level, the curb (which follows the bathroom subfloor) is not.

Did you notice the upside down panel at the bottom? I wouldn't mention it to the captain. a) it doesn't matter, and b) he might call you a cementitious lunk head.